One with Akshay Kumar's wife..

Why isn't Akshay Kumar's wife as bigger star as he is..?
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because..


Twinkle Twinkle little star.. :P :P

The one with su-su

Ek kutta raste pe su-su karta hai, Ek aadmi us su-su par khada ho jata hai..





toh, uss aadmi ko aap kya kahenge...??
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SU-PAR-MAN...!!!!

The one with the crow - 2

What will you say if your Pet Crow came second in a race?
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Mi-Cro-Second...!!

The one with a crow.

One guy had a crow..... The crow was very tender.... now tell me what could possibly be the name of the crow.....??












answer : MI-CRO-SOFT :P

The one with the oldest animal.

Which is the oldest animal ?











Answer : Zebra.

how?








Because its still in "black and white".. :D

The one with shit.

What will you call SHIT in the evening?














SHAM - POO :)

The one with mountain and no mountain.

Which one is higher ? "mountain" or "no mountain" ?









answer : "no mountain"..

why?







because - " no mountain is higher than Mt.Everest" :D

The one with bournvita

A boy throws a bottle of Bournvita out of the window......A cat catches it , and takes the bottle of Bournvita and buries it under the ground...why???












Because its "CAT-BURIES" Bournvita..

The one with cow shouting

A cow standing on the road keeps shouting 'F'... 'F'...

Why???










Because F=ma ( Newton 's Second Law :) )

The one with Superman, Spideman and Batman -1

In 1975 Superman, Spiderman andBatman were flying over India for some work...suddenly all of them die...why? rather how...??











Gabbar Singh says,.. " Aadmni 3 aur goli 6 !! ..."
dishkyaaww....diskyaawww....diskyaawwww......!!

The one with chicken and egg - 1

Q : What came first? Chicken or Egg?
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A : Obviously Chicken ! Because ......

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God would look stupid when sitting on an egg and trying to hatch it

The one with a girl in trouble.

a guy gets a call on his mobile...
help me!! a man is trying to kill me..

guy: who r u?? where r u??

girl: im trapped in a cage..dunno where i am ..plz help me!

guy: dont worry i'll help you...dont be afraid..


guy calls up the police station..

"a girl is in trouble...help plz"
police: address plz..
guy: i dunno..
police peeps hang up..


guy calls up his dad..
"dad plz help..i gotta call from this girl..shes in trouble.."
dad: where r u..


suddenly the boy slips n falls down....

tell me why...











because he lost balance!

The one with Lord Krishna.

Which city in the United States is most afraid of Lord Krishna??
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Kansas City!

The one with the woodcutter.

Once a woodcutter starts off from his home to the forest for chopping wood. Suddenly, all the women of the village start running after him. Why?
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The 'Axe' effect! :P

The one with Shaam

Shaam Jawaan Hai......
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Shaam Jawaan Hai.......

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Shaam Jawaan Hai........
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Aur.....
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Ghanshaam MAJOR.....

The one with a bear

A bear has fallen from a height of 10 meters.

It took square-root of 2 seconds for it to fall on the ground

Now can you tell me the COLOR of the bear based on this information?

Please don't think this is a foolish question...

The answer to it is very logical...








ok the answer..


01. The bear has fallen from a height of 10 m
02. It took square root(2) sec for it to fall.
03. Obviously it's initial velocity is zero (since it's a freely
falling body).
04. Let's assume the acceleration due to gravity is: 'a'
meters/seconds square at that place.
05. So applying the formula.. S = ut + (1/2*a*t^2) we know... u = 0,
S = 10, t = square root(2) secs Hence, 10 = 0*sqroot(2) + {(1/2) * a
* 2 }
06. Solving the above equation gives a = 10 meters/seconds square
07. For a free falling body 'a' is the gravitational pull which is
g=9.8 m/s^2
08. Hence at that place where the bear fell, the acceleration due to
gravity is the highest (its greater than 9.8 and since wkt a)
09. This can happen only at the poles .. (North or South)
10. And we know that only polar bears can survive in the sub zero
temperatures of the poles
11. And no points for guessing that the colour of a Polar bear is
WHITE!!!

The one with ahimsa

Gandhiji ahimsa ko kyo mantethe









Kyun ki who jantethe









Dhishum dhishum toh pepsodent ka kaam hai....

The one with 'khuda'

Idhar khuda hai, Udhar khuda hai,
Idahr khuda hai, Udhar khuda hai,
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Jahan dekho wahan khuda hai,
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Har jagah sirf khuda hi khuda hai,
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aur jahan nahi khuda hai......
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wahan kal khudega!!!!!!

The one with a man is unable to read

Once there was a well educated man who could talk, write and understand English but he could not read, why???????










Kyonki uski "read" ki haddi tuti hui thi.

The one with KhadakSingh

Once upon a time Khadak Singh decides to compete in a cycle race. He practices day and night for it... but starts feeling nervous one day before the race. He calls up his Mother to feel better. He speaks with his Mom all night long.. and she encourages him a lot. She says, "Beta mera aashirwaad tumhare saath hai! " Finally Khadaksingh gets up early morning and gears up for the big race..

But the moment the race is flagged off, Khadaksingh falls off from his cycle...he couldn't ride it even for a centimetre's distance!!!

Why is it so??????





Because raat bhar mobile pe Maa ke saath baat karke uska balance khatam ho jaata hai

The one with the difference - 1

Whats the difference between an elephant n a biscuit......??????
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its simple....
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u cannot dip an elephant into a cup of tea.....

PJs

hello world..!!